Portrait: Polly
My name is Polly Williamson and in December 2011, aged 42 years, I was kicked in the head by a horse causing a traumatic brain injury. I was in a coma for 11 days and had post traumatic amnesia for two months.
A little bit about Polly
I was a patient at The Brain Injury Rehabilitation Unit in Bristol for four months. The unit was truly excellent and taught me to walk, talk and think again. I was married and a mum to two boys, aged two and six at the time. I ran my own successful equestrian business and in my youth had represented Great Britain in the sport of Eventing, winning six European Gold Medals and placings at Badminton and Burghley.
Challenges experienced during recovery
For me, the most significant difficulty following my injury was losing my identity, so much so I felt I should change my name. I’ve now discovered this is quite common with brain injury survivors and have come across many examples of this from fellow brain injury survivors.
Writing my memoir ‘Where did I go?’ was a cathartic experience and helped me understand much of my recovery road. I have been contacted by many people who’ve had a brain injury or a stroke explaining how the book helped them too, which has meant so much to me. When I spoke at the annual Headway conference, a man came up at the end explaining he had survived a brain injury and did change his name by deed poll. Two years after my book was published, I read a poem on the Headway site writtten by a fellow TBI survivor Joseph McAloon. One line reads: ‘I can’t find Joseph. Tell me, where did he go?’. This brought a deep sense of connection to what I had also been experiencing.
“Not knowing who I was, seeing my brain operating on an unknown channel and my heightened senses (sound, smell) strenghten the belief of lost identity”
Other challenges that I navigate are headaches, fatigue, I can find myself to be impatient at times and I am still working on balance issues.
Moving forward
Establishing short term and long term goals has played a crucial part in my recovery. Amongst the chaos, I worked hard to find myself again. I went on to complete The Bath Half Marathon raising a considerable amount of funds for the rehab Unit where I was a patient. I wrote and published a memoir and shared my experience in various presentations over the years. What I am the most proud of has been to return to my most important roles, that of mum and wife.
However, I hadn’t fully dealt with the emotional trauma so six years post-accident, I sought help. Consulting a leading psychologist helped me immensely to build my confidence and instill a belief that I was the same person. EMDR therapy also gave me tools to use when my brain was beginning to overload and doubt. These tools are invaluable to me.
A must during recovery
I have been fortunate and received incredible support from my family, most notably my husband.
If this can offer hope to someone earlier in recovery, I want to note that I continued to improve for many years post accident. I am still working at improving some functions and I have learnt to work with my brain injury. I have key words and reminders saved on my phone which I can read whenever I feel like I am struggling. I lead a busy, working life but I have had to learn to work round my weaknesses and take the positives from my changed situation.
Words of advice to other survivors
Following the five points helped me find myself:
- Build confidence achieving goals, however small. One of my first goals was reading a bedtime story to my 2-year-old son.
- Resilience and determination. We are all stronger than we think.
- Write things down like your goals, doubts and concerns.
- Seek professional help when/where needed particularly if loss of identity is experienced.
- Use tools that help you in those uncertain times. On my phone I have a list of words/sentences (from my psychological sessions) that I read before any demanding task or at times of stress.
A quote that helped me
Keep on. Keep on.